BY JOHNATHAN WHITE
Statistically the average man takes 4-6 minutes in bed before ejaculating - yet most women take 20-40 minutes to become fully aroused and orgasmic. Many men feel sexually inferior to their partners, and this often leads to a battle for supremacy in other areas of the relationship. It may even extend beyond the relationship, as men try to dominate in politics, economics, and religion. But in the bedroom, the woman still holds the supreme sexual power. After all, women birth children from their wombs, as the goddesses of birthing life the hold sexual superiority. Ancient Taoists viewed sex as a very natural and important aspect of daily life, and developed methods to harmonize sexual exchange. For men, this involves learning to control their ejaculation, experience full-body orgasms, and deepen the energetic exchange with their partner. When a man learns to prevent his sexual fire from quickly burning out, while skillfully arousing and bringing the female sexual waters to a boil, the imbalance between male and female evens out and the battle of the sexes becomes a harmonious dance.
Constant ejaculation is one of the main reasons that modern men’s sexual vitality plummets in their 30’s and 40’s. A powerful remedy to this is practicing ejaculation regulation, or semen retention. Semen retention is an ancient concept that has been practiced for hundreds, or even thousands of years by Taoist alchemists, martial arts masters, Indian yogis (known as bramacharya in Indian heritage), and in various other religious and esoteric spiritual circles. For men, a single average ejaculation contains around 250 to 500 million sperm. Considering that each of these single sperm can grow into a human body when combined with an egg, and also considering how much an individual human is capable of, this is a tremendous amount of energy and potential. And unfortunately, the average man has no comprehension of the potential in his seed and is happy to discharge this energy into a tissue.
When a man is constantly ejaculating, his body is depleted. It takes a great amount of energy and resources for the body to create new sperm. As nature’s priority is survival of the species, the body sacrifices the reserves of nutrients and minerals from the various organs and glands to be redirected into semen production. Seminal fluid is especially high in zinc, constant ejaculation can lead to a deficiency in zinc, leading to low testosterone levels, depression, brain fog, and lack of motivation. But semen represents more than just physical nutrients, hormones, and chemical compounds - it is the essential life force of the man’s body. It represents his masculine drive to accomplish himself in the world, to grow and transform, to fulfill his spiritual and worldly destiny. The Taoists regard sperm as being an aspect of “Jing”. Jing represents the lower vibrational spectrum of life force energy. As it is vibrating slower, it manifests as physical matter in a fixed form. All the hormones and fluids of the body, and especially the sexual fluids, are our source of Jing. The Taoists say that when our Jing is depleted, we age quickly, disease manifests, and death follows. By regulating his ejaculation and not overindulging in ejaculation, a man can significantly improve his energy, his ambition and magnetism, and keep himself youthful into old age.
Many Indian Yogis practice Brahmacharya, which is translated to “living in the way of Brahma.” This is often associated with abstaining from sensual indulges, especially sex and orgasm. Many other traditions promote celibacy as a solution to the spiritual and physical downward spiral that constant ejaculation leads into. The common problem here is that forced suppression of sexual desire is usually not a sustainable solution. Sexual energy is a very powerful force that can only be contained for so long, if you try to shove it into the closet it often remerges and is acted out in very disruptive ways. The Catholic Church is a prime example of this.
The Taoist solution to this problem is simple - learn to practice ejaculation control during sex, so that the sexual power can be preserved while experiencing the deep intimacy and pleasurable exchange of intercourse. The Taoists developed methods to circulate orgasmic energy internally, capturing the sexual charge and harnessing it to supercharge the organs, the glands, and brain; enhancing health, energy levels, and creativity. This leads to powerful full-body orgasms and deeply altered states of consciousness, without spilling a drop of semen. This energy can also be circulated between lovers, creating a deep intimate connection and intensifying the healing yin-yang exchange.
This practice of Taoist and Tantric sexuality has been life-changing for me. Like many men, I was addicted to porn in my teenage years and early 20’s. Nearly every day, I would sit stiffly in the chair in front of a computer screen and spill my life force in a short peak of ecstatic numbness, followed by lethargy and post ejaculatory “hangover”. Around the age of 22, this started taking a toll on my energy and relationships. I lived in a fog of addictive patterns, lacking the ambition to seek out my life’s purpose. I lacked the confidence to approach women who I found attractive, I was timid and had no drive in my life as I was constantly ejecting out my masculine charge. I began practicing yoga and meditation. One day, I stumbled upon a copy of Mantak Chia’s book “Multi-Orgasmic Man”. I did my best to learn the practices from the book, my results were limited but a seed was planted in my awareness that there was more to sexuality than a limited physical encounter ending in an explosive, yet draining ejaculation. I started seeking out teachers, and eventually studied with Michael Winn, co-author of “Taoist Secrets of Love: Cultivating Male Sexual Energy.”
I learned the secrets of Qigong and Taoist internal alchemy. I directly experienced the energy meridians, which are rivers of life force flowing through the body. Qigong is an ancient practice utilizing breath, gentle movement, and meditative awareness to guide Chi (subtle energy) through the body. Qigong is the language of energy, and has been a tool for me to clear emotional blockages, old beliefs, and to energize myself with the abundant universal energy. Once I had the basic skill of guiding my internal energy, I learned to apply this to sexual experience. When a man becomes aroused, his sexual energy is activating. The sperm start to swim around in excitement, generating a tremendous amount of electrical energy. As the energy builds, it starts to become congested and starts to flow outward. This flow moves in the path of least resistance - for most men this path is directly out the penis in an ejaculation. By working with internal energy practices, I learned to create new pathways for the energy to move in. The primary channel is called the Microcosmic Orbit, running from the perineum up the back of the spine, over the head and down the front of the body back down to the perineum. Connecting the tongue to the roof of the mouth completes this circuit. By using breath, visualization, and subtle muscular engagements, I could circulate the sexual energy through my Microcosmic Orbit as I became aroused. This diffuses the aroused energy, keeping ejaculation at bay while bringing the orgasmic charge through the entire body. This greatly enhanced my sexual experience, during sex I could keep this sexual energy flowing, never building up to a point of ejaculation. I started to experience states of powerful full-body orgasm. It started as a deep subtle pulsation in my belly, and started to expand to my heart, and into my brain. I was looking deep into my partners eyes, feeling as though we were merging together. I could feel her experience as well, and I knew we were in a powerful unison orgasm. My brain was pulsating with blissful orgasmic waves, and I felt my awareness extending beyond our bodies, beyond the room, and deep into the cosmos. This lasted for a few minutes before settling back down, I continue to have experiences like this during lovemaking which are quite beyond the conventional ejaculatory orgasm which most men have only ever experienced.
To start circulating your sexual energy, try this simple practice: See your sexual center as a glowing pearl of pink energy. As you inhale, gently contract the perineum muscles (same as a Kegel exercise) and feel this pearl expand like a balloon. As you exhale, relax the perineum and feel the pink pearl contract. After a few rounds of this breathing, as you inhale and squeeze the perineum, bring the pink energy up into your heart. As you exhale feel the sexual energy concentrating in your heart center, mixing your sexual energy with loving heart energy. You can bring this energy into any area of your body, supercharging yourself with sexual energy. Try this exercise any time of the day and in any situation, notice if others start to react differently to your presence. You may find that you become very magnetic, as your aura is radiating this attractive sexual energy. Use this exercise before doing creative work, before exercising, before working with a client, and you will find that it helps you channel powerful sexual energy into all activities.
The average person in this world has no comprehension of the immense power of their sexual energy. It’s a bit like having a million dollars in the bank, but not being able to access it. You can invest this energy to grow and enhance your health, relationships, abundance, career, and your spiritual path. Everything you put this energy into will blossom. Just as a tree grows from such a small seed, you can create an entire life of your choosing by harnessing the power of your sexual energy.
Want to learn to control your sexual energy during intercourse? Make sure you grab my free ejaculation control guide HERE!